Self Care Sunday- Positive thinking and safeguarding your mental health

Don’t let anyone or anything to dull your sparkle.” 

― Pradeepa Pandiyan

Self care can be more than taking care of your skin or your body. It also can be about taking care of your mental health and wellbeing. Today I want to talk about following your own path and not letting negativity affect you and bring you down.  I had a lesson in that today when I was told that a number of people still talk about me behind my back a lot. (Also, the fact that a few people still think I am transgender for some reason.)

My initial reaction is to wonder what I’m doing wrong and what about how I present myself makes people question me. I want to add that I don’t think there is anything wrong with being transgender or that being called that is negative or a slur in some way. It’s just puzzling because I was assigned female at birth and have presented that way my whole life.  I start wanting to second guess things and throw out possibilities like the way I dress (more feminine than most women I see), or the fact that I have short hair, short nails, and small breasts.

It’s frustrating because one person could be chalked up to some bias or quirk of perception. Multiple people thinking it makes me wonder if it could be something about me. I try to keep in mind that it is about them and that there is nothing wrong with me. God doesn’t make garbage. I am me and I should celebrate that. It’s hard to silence the voice of doubt but I do it.  I remind myself that those people really don’t matter. I am unique. I am special. I am living according to my values and trying to make the world a better place. I am me and I am enough. (That doesn’t mean I still don’t wonder and want to ask people why they think what they do.)

It also helps to pamper myself a bit. Listen to some favorite music. Watch a show I like. Watch cat and dog videos on YouTube or TikTok.  Go for a walk. Try a new lip color or nail polish.
One of the ways I took care of myself today was to try a new spring nail color. I usually stick with my tried and true favorites like red, black, wine, etc. Sometimes though it’s nice to take a break from the tried and true and wear something new.

This is Lagune from the new Chanel spring 2024 makeup collection. (The highlighter in the picture is also from that collection.) I like how pearly the blue looks and how the sparkles show up in the sunlight. I also like how this blue matches a number of dresses and tops I have.

Finally, here are a few songs I like when I need something to pump me up and improve my mood:

I am what I am from “La Cage aux Folles”- I particularly like John Barrowman’s version.

This is me from “The Greatest Show”

I want to be around by Tony Bennett- This is more of a breakup song but I feel it fits when. You’re annoyed at people too.

I will survive by Gloria Gaynor

invincible by Pat Benatar

Stronger by Kelly Clarkson (I also like Kanye West’s version)